Rumours and Tango

Because I haven’t been seen around the Milongas much since the start of winter, I am always being asked if there is a man on the scene, as if that is the only reason to stop dancing.  I have been asked this many times over the last few years.  I am usually asked this question by men, and particularly the Argentines.  Perhaps it is because the men might have ulterior motives other than dancing.  I have been told by many Latin men that they learn to dance in order to meet women.  In saying that, they also learn to become good dancers.  Perhaps it is their macho pride.  I would always laugh at them and say that even if there were a man on the scene, that wouldn’t stop me from dancing.

Sometimes I go on holiday or I am busy at work.  In the last year or so I have been going out mainly on the weekends.  I have been hibernating in the winters.  It has been a good time to catch up on films I hadn’t seen or read a few books and catch up with friends.   As I used to go out nearly five nights a week for around three and a half years, I suppose any change in my habits will get people speculating on my personal life, especially as I have never been seen with anyone.

After 3.5 years of dancing nearly five nights a week and seeing the same faces each evening, many of whom I don’t dance with for whatever reason, it can get a bit old.  After the first two evenings sometimes you run out of things to talk about as you said it all the first night.  You can see the same people every evening and some of them won’t even acknowledge you.  That is something I will never understand.

Sometimes I go to Ceroc or Salsa nearer to home.  I have been trying to go out a couple of times during the week, but recently I had injured my leg and haven’t been able to dance anything for a couple of weeks.  My leg is better now so I will be out dancing again.

A friend of mine hasn’t been dancing for a few months as she has an injury.  People think that she has a man and that is why she is not dancing.  ‘I haven’t seen so and so around lately, maybe I should give her a call’, they say.  I tell them they should call her as she is not dancing because she has an injury and can’t dance.  They looked shocked and tell me that they thought it was because she might be seeing someone.  She is seeing someone, her doctor, and he told her she can’t dance.  Geeze!  I really don’t understand why they hadn’t already contacted her if they were that concerned about her in the first place.

Women stay away from dancing for many reasons.  I am generalising about dancing as this seems to be a common thread in the various dance forms that I do, not just Tango.  There are times when the women become more accomplished than the men and that leaves the women with few good dancers to dance with.  So the women will stay away or try something different for a little while before they go back to dancing again.  When they return, everything seems fresh as there may be new people to dance with or the previous dancers have improved.  I have spoken to many women who have become disenchanted with the dance scene here in London.  They say they get bored with seeing the same old faces or they are not dancing as much as they used to.  The one thing that we all feel is that the dancing will always be there for us whenever we decide to come back to it.

Now that I feel competent with my dancing, I don’t feel the need to go out as often and I can get back to doing other things.  After all, dancing did take up a huge part of my social life at one time.  I am surprised that I still have friends left.  I do have other interests and have recently been enjoying other activities.  I have been meeting non-dance people.  I had forgotten that there are other things in life to enjoy apart from dance.

Now it just so happens that there is man in my life, and I haven’t been seen in London on the weekends.   I haven’t given up dancing.  I just go dancing on different days of the week.  I have been investigating Tango near where my amor lives and will be trying out new venues and will be meeting new people.  Since I don’t usually travel out of my normal area for Tango, I am really looking forward to it.

I am involved with a non-dancer who has the potential to become a good dancer (I have tested his moves and he has musicality!), whether of Tango or Ceroc, Salsa, Jive, etc., who knows.  Or maybe not, it is up to him.  Either way, I am not giving up on dance just because there is a man in my life.

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Tit&TAckle
    Apr 13, 2009 @ 21:52:51

    Hi Arlene

    We started to read this article on rumours and tango with much interest. But yeah people come and go in tango So what ????
    What we want to know is the real rumours in tango. Can anyone else enlighten us with any juicy comments? I can tell you one thing and that is

  2. Voice Of Reason
    Apr 13, 2009 @ 22:08:12

    Hi Arlene

    I am pleased to hear your news. You didn’t mention that on Friday when we were chatting in Negracha. Hope it goes well and you keep dancing as you say. Be happy and support the campaign for food at Negracha.
    Fatty – by the way that was none other than my grannie helping me. She is quite glam I admit and she has won several glamorous grannie contests. She has all her own teeth you know. I have told her of your compliments and she says she likes a bloke she can get hold of. How do you feel about a double date with you, me, tango- totty and my Grannie. She said you should bring your big box of chocolates. Can you ask Tango totty if she is up for it? Or perhaps just a meal. Are you out there Totty?


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