What Makes a Tango Memorable?

There have been a few tweets going around about memorable Tangos, mostly from women.  One lady tweeted that it seems as if only the women remember memorable Tangos.  I replied, tongue in cheek, that if a woman remembers a good Tango, it is because she may have had many bad or indifferent ones.

There are many reasons why a moment would be memorable, such as it being the first time you did something, like a first kiss, or the first time you travelled on a plane.  Anything you did something special or unusual for the first time will usually be memorable.

I will never forget the first time I danced with my first Tango teacher.  I was nervous, but he danced gently with me and it made me feel great.

I remember going to my first milonga and not being able to dance because I only knew how to dance large. (I changed teachers after that!)

I remember going to Corrientes (at Tavistock Place) for the first time and only having two dances during the whole evening.  Not two tandas, just two dances! (I was still a beginner)

I remember going to Corrientes four weeks later and dancing almost the whole evening!

I remember the first time I had ‘that Tango feeling’.  Aah!  (And the other times after that I can count on one hand)

I have a lot of Tango firsts that are memorable.  There are other things that can make a Tango memorable, such as when I  just move to the music and not just pay too much attention to what my leader was asking me to do.  When two people are in sync with each other and the music, that can make it memorable.

Not all memorable moments are good however.  Things can be memorable because they are unpleasant.  I will never forget the moment when someone told me I had no style (I had only been dancing 6 months!).  Or the men that think it is ok to cop a feel on the dance floor, or the ones that have BO and BB!  That list goes on.

These days my Tangos are memorable because I am not dancing so much since I have moved out of London.

Women are usually good at expressing themselves.  It is how we solve problems and form solidarity.  Even if we complain, we feel a lot better afterwards.  Better out than in.  This probably explains why there are mostly women tweeting about memorable Tangos, good and bad, but mainly good ones.  One can almost hear the yearning when reading about their wonderful Tango.  It makes me wonder about the ones danced in-between the memorable ones.

I’m sure there are men that have memorable Tangos too.   They must have their fair share of good and bad experiences that make a Tango memorable, not dissimilar to the ones that women experience.  They are just not talking about it (certainly not writing about it).  Fair enough.

So, what makes a Tango memorable for you?

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8 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Mari
    Jan 22, 2010 @ 13:58:20

    I too remember my first dance with my teacher. I was so nervous, but he too was very gentle, and so confident that I could follow what he led – which made me confident too.

    I remember the first time I was so exhausted, so upset about other things, that I shut off everything but my leader and the music – that was the first experience of el duende.

    I can count my complete tango bliss moments on one hand – and I remember the music playing, the venue, the cologne of my partners, all of it.

    Two tangueros have shared with me their tango bliss moments, so I know they have them too. They don’t tend to write about them unfortunately – but it ‘s so beautiful when they do.

  2. Kirra
    Jan 22, 2010 @ 17:47:16

    What a good post, Arlene. For me all of the good dances (tango moments) were not fancy or flashy, they were simple and clear with great musicality. Some moments were with relatively new dancers, too. When you have a tango moment you both feel it, it is a mutual experience.

  3. yabotil
    Jan 22, 2010 @ 18:31:54

    I remember why I invite using eye contact – the few times I’ve invited and rejected verbally with the reason of needing to rest only to see the woman get up in the same song to dance.

    I remember the first time I was kicked up the bum on a very crowded dance floor.

    And I remember how I’ve met some of my tanguera friends who make my milongas so enjoyable.

  4. El Chupacabra
    Jan 23, 2010 @ 01:32:11

    Would be interesting to see what makes a tango memorable for men.

  5. Mr Tango Walker
    Jan 23, 2010 @ 17:42:18

    What makes a tango memorable for me is a partner who listens to her own dance…Yes as a leader i may mark time and choose the subject but you must decide how you wish to dance it.And nothing beats a partner who listens to the music Really listen’s and when we are dancing i feel her love for the music not for adorno’s..
    As Kirra said
    For me all of the good dances (tango moments) were not fancy or flashy.
    More leaders need to hear this …..

  6. TP
    Jan 24, 2010 @ 18:38:27

    The moment the woman truly embraces me … everything else is forgotten.

  7. tangocorazon
    Jan 25, 2010 @ 17:40:56

    Kicked in the bum, the shin, as you sit watching…I think I have tried to block these moments out with better moments!

    I love hearing what the leads are saying and some good points too…goes back to manners does it not? If, as a follow, I reject a dance invite then I need to sit out that tanda no matter who else asks me.

    For Leads and Follows it is the same (as TangoWalker and TP have said) love of the music and fearlessness. Yay!

    Kirra

  8. Habanera
    Feb 08, 2010 @ 19:54:05

    How to forget the perfect embrace? Warm, soft, intense, attentive, passionate. Expectations played a role too. We had been gazing at each other for weeks before plucking up the courage to dance (silly, I know). No flashy moves involved. We never danced again since as I moved away right after but the memory of that embrace will stay with me for some time still

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